Day 34 - Why I Haven't Posted

You're probably wondering why I haven't posted yet today...

Well, yesterday afternoon I took the kids to a Dollar Tree nearby. For those of you unfamiliar, Dollar Tree is one of those stores where everything actually does cost a dollar. Unlike some of those other establishments that call themselves a dollar store and then try and stick you with a $3.99 price tag for a yo-yo...

Personally, I always want to slap the owner of those spots but they would never be caught dead inside their own store thereby preventing them from an inevitable assault at the hands of a misled customer.

ANYWAY, after we arrive we're recognized by a blog reader (seriously)...Ethan shows her how he can spin around in a circle. She asks me if I taught him that...

Yeah, I taught him how to spin.

Moving on, we find the toy aisle...I had no idea what I was getting myself into.

Aside from potentially picking up more germs than my antibiotics knew what to do with, half the toys were all mangled and beaten up...For example, I picked up a drum that I figured the kids would like...I hit the skin and my hand went through it...

So that went back on the shelf and we walked quickly to a different section...

I originally thought this trip would take 15 minutes tops.

I was wrong. This trip took 45 minutes. Before we tried to check out.

After an agonizing period of walking up and down the aisles with Ethan and Summer because neither could focus long enough to make up their mind (Owen settled on a wrestling figure after 18 seconds) I finally start to get frustrated...

"Alright, you guys have 1 minute to find your toy or I'm picking it for you"

Mad dash. E&S are scrambling. Toys are being thrown into the aisle in an effort to see everything.

At one point, Ethan borderline pushes an older lady out of his way...

The minute is up and they still haven't decided. I don't have the heart to choose...mainly because I can't decide myself.

Finally, Summer settles on one of those felt pictures you color...the package comes complete with 6 mini markers and her picture features Cinderella. SOLD.

Ethan - though a big fan of boy stuff - also has a soft spot for girly crap...So he grabs one with Tinkerbell...Owen, not to be left out, drops his Macho Man Randy Savage knock off figurine and grabs a felt picture of some character named Silvermint (which sounds like the name of a strip club...)

[Side Note: Last night I had dinner with my Mom and Sister and over a nice meal of porridge -jk, steak...we're kind of high rollers - I tell them how I tried to push the boys away from the girly objects...At which point my sister tells me I was the same way as a kid because I had a cabbage patch doll - Touche...Tica: 1, Victor: 0]

Anyway, I don't really care that they're getting these items because I'm just ecstatic to get out of the Dollar Tree...It's now 5:30 and I'm officially off-duty...

We head to check out.

Apparently, Tuesdays are when they put the D team on the registers because this was ridiculous. We were in line for 25 minutes...

Summer, at one point, looks up at me, sighs heavily and asks me whats taking so long.

I beam proudly because she said it loud enough for everyone to hear. Well played Summer, that sassy side can be used for good apparently.

Another register opens. I thank Summer.

We FINALLY check out...

As a favor to the parents, I tell my coworkers that if they want their pictures they have to be good all night. In the morning, if CEO & CFO sign off on their behavior, I'll give them their toys.

They aren't a fan of my decision but I don't care. This isn't a democracy. Until they can grow facial hair I'm calling the shots.

So this morning we colored and colored and took a break because these cheap markers kept getting winded...

Needless to say, their pictures look awesome but every single marker is now dead...But, hell, what could I expect for a dollar??

And now I'm going to go figure out what we're going to do for lunch...